The beginning according to Erica:

I’ve come to accept that I probably developed a crush on Ryan the first time I saw him. I had just returned from studying abroad the first semester of my Junior year at Notre Dame (his freshman year) and when I walked into an ISI worship session he caught my eye right away. He carried himself confidently and I was sure he wasn’t a freshman, so I assumed he was a transfer and asked my friend Linsey where he’d come from. Turns out he was a freshman, and she introduced us and began our great love story.

I proceeded to find excuses to talk to and spend time with him (i.e. the WWJD bracelet mentioned in his story that I really did need to send to my host brother in Mexico, but easily could have found myself), and we started to hang out more frequently. I specifically remember talking with a friend that semester who talked about how she’d been really intentional about building friendships with guys, and making it clear from the very start to avoid later confusion or awkwardness that they were just friends. As she told me this, I didn’t tell her, but I thought to myself that I was not going to make that clarification with Ryan, as I very much wanted to keep that door open, despite telling EVERYONE that he was ‘just a friend,’ or ‘some freshman from ISI that was nice and cute but I would never date.’ The best part is that all throughout, Ryan was unintentionally sending some very confusing signals. Like who walks a girl back to her dorm twice a week, goes on weekly Dining Hall dates, texts her goodnight with a bible verse daily and has no intention of being more than friends with a girl?? Well, as most of you know, Ryan does…

Fast-forward to the end of the semester and my trip to Africa. When I woke up from my accident, I had received messages from friends and loved ones everywhere, and as overwhelmed as I was by the unbelievable outpouring of love, I was pretty upset that Ryan hadn’t texted me even though my mom verified that he knew and had even communicated with her. Turns out I wasn’t too subtle about this, and my mom and aunt quickly figured out that maybe I wanted to be more than just friends with this guy. For the record, Ryan had texted me, some of the texts just weren’t coming through. I texted him first (I thought) anyway.

Back at school that fall, Ryan and I continued to be friends and hang out. After weeks (and in some cases months) of being called out by friends, I finally admitted to a select few that I liked him. (Some of them weren’t too subtle about it, and I now know that Ryan started to get a clue…). I ended up telling Ryan too, and leaving it in his hands to do with that information what he wanted. That led to a few more months of friendship, some really intentional time for me to get back onto my own two feet, to re-establish a faith that rooted me before anything else after a summer that had turned my life upside down, and eventually Ryan realizing that he was willing to take a risk and see where dating me might lead. Thank goodness he did….

The beginning according to Ryan:

I first met Erica second semester of my freshman year when she came back from studying abroad. She came up after the first ISI of the semester and asked about where to buy a WWJD bracelet. I told her I had an extra she could have but she insisted on buying me candy to thank me. She surprised me with Reese’s, which are my favorite candy and I was pretty convinced that we would be good friends. That semester we got to know each other more through walking back to our dorms after ISI and lunches in the dinning hall. One of my friends would take a picture and text me every time I ate with Erica, “Dinning Hall Date?”. I would laugh and hastily respond, “no we’re just friends.” We also started going to church together towards the end of the semester, which helped us grow our friendship.

At the start of that summer I was getting ready to go to Missouri to work as a camp counselor when I got a call from Erica’s roommate that she had been in an accident in South Africa. I sent her a few texts, that were very delayed in arriving, and stayed updated with the emails from her mom. I kept praying for her and with every report it seemed she was getting better. I asked friends to pray for Erica too and one asked me, “Ryan, could you see yourself dating this girl?” I said no she’s just a friend who needs prayers. The last update I got before I lost service for the summer said that Erica was going to okay and that she was progressing enough to be discharged and flown back to Colorado. While at camp I got a letter from Erica filling me in on how she was doing being back and recovering from all that had happened. I had tons of friends promise to write me letters and only a few who actually followed through, so getting that letter meant a lot. I knew that I was excited to keep growing in our friendship when we got back to school.

When I got back to campus I needed to go to the store so I called Erica because she had a car. She helped me pick out dorm stuff and we talked about all that had happened that summer then I took her out to dinner as a thank you. (Her friends consider that our first date, I still considered her squarely in the friend zone at that point).

After I invited myself to play on Erica’s flag football team I ended up spending more time with her and her friends. One night I overheard Colby talking about how Erica liked me and I pretended not to hear and walked back to my dorm. Yes, I was a stupid boy but I didn’t really know what to do with that so I just pretended not to know.

A few weeks we were catching up after a difficult week and towards the end of our conversation Erica said she had something else to tell me, “I think I have feelings for you, you can either respond now or wait and respond later.” I didn’t know what to say so I once again took the easy way out and said thanks for telling me but I’ll respond later. She was two years older and of course I thought she was awesome but I’d never really considered this a possibility and now it was. I freaked out to anyone who would listen for the entire next week not wanting to blow it but also not really feeling ready to date. The next Friday I said that I thought it would probably be best if we just stayed friends and didn’t date.

A few more weeks past and we kept hanging out together and I finally stopped being so dumb realized that I really liked Erica but now I had to play it cool in case she had moved on after I had told her I didn’t want to date. Naturally I showed how much I liked Erica by sending her smiley faces at the end of texts. Being who she is Erica called me out on my smiley faces so I started making up BS reasons why I was sending them to lots of people. At spring break we both went home with our best friends but texted constantly the whole trip. I had made up my mind that I wanted to ask her out and it had to be soon. The night we got back to campus the power went out in Pang so I invited Erica to come study in the O’Neill common space. We were probably the most annoying people ever that night because we did 0 studying and a lot of flirting. The next day I texted her asking if we could talk and we decided to go to main building that night. After a few minutes of small talk I told her that I really liked her and that she could respond now or later. She said she didn’t need any time and she said she liked me too and she became my girlfriend (Erica usually knows what she wants). That night I got back to my dorm and called her to pray together to commit our relationship to the Lord. That Friday we went on our first “real date” which consisted of terrible food and an awkward dance while Erica wasn’t feeling well but it ended in our first kiss. I’d have to say almost every date since then has been better and I grow more in love with her everyday.